I got together with Pete today to debug a game I will be hosting at the upcoming wargame event at the National Warplane Museum at Geneseo. The game is called Mars Needs Women! The rules are UFO Squad. The scenario has a landing party of 10 Martians pursuing three Earth women (the Pidgeon sisters) so they can bring them back to their home planet for study. The women flee into the woods on Robertson land. Yes, those Robertsons from the Duck Dynasty show.
Look Phil! Little green Yankees!
The Robertsons spotted the UFO descending into their woods, grabbed their guns and headed out. They were Patriarch Phil, his sons Willy, Allen, Jep and Jase, and Willy's sons John-Luke and Cole. Willy's boys had scoped hunting rifles and the others were armed with assault rifles. As the Robertsons parked their pickup trucks on the trail and started moving into the woods they heard the fleeing women scream. Phil sprinted forward followed more cautiously by most of the others. Jep and Jace stayed close to the trucks. Phil took cover and opened fire on the Martians who had already grabbed two of the fleeing women.
Two women captured and one to go!
The unexpected arrival of the Robertsons created a distraction that allowed the third woman to evade her pursuers and eventually make it to the safety of the trucks. The Martians returned fire on Phil, and he was badly wounded. Allen, following close behind also fell, badly wounded by the Martian laser weapons.
June Pidgeon, the one who got away
Willy's son John Luke took up a position in a copse of trees and undergrowth with a good field of fire on Martians moving to bring their prisoners back to the saucer. A pair of Martians were detailed to pin him down but he kept their heads down with effective fire. He was soon joined in the copse by his dad, Willy. Uncle Si made his way into the swamp trying to reach Phil, but was pinned down by heavy fire.
John Luke gives 'em hell!
Things were looking bad for the Earthlings, with two of the three women captured, two Robertsons badly wounded, two more back at the trucks and the rest under heavy fire. The Martians had only to return to their ship and leave with their two female prisoners to win. However, John Luke and Willy were still in the copse, resisting, and Cole was making his way up to support them. At this point, the Martian commander made a fateful decision. Instead of departing the planet with his mission accomplished he decided to crush the puny Earthlings who dared oppose him. He directed his landing party to move through the swampy area killing the two badly wounded Robertsons and the pinned down Uncle Si. From there the Martians would be able to finish off Willy and his sons in and around the copse of trees beyond. It proved to be a costly mistake as Willy and his boys laid down a withering fire on the aliens as they struggled through the swamp. Two of the Martians were badly wounded and the rest withdrew to their saucer and departed.
Never get into a land war in Asia and never scrap with Louisiana boys in a swamp
The next morning a pair of men in black suits arrived at Phil's house where the two wounded aliens were being held. Identifying themselves as Federal agents, the men in black promised a second team would follow up to take their statements regarding the encounter, took custody of the wounded Martians and drove away. When no follow up contact occurred, the family tried to find someone in authority to report the incident to. They were thwarted at every turn, finally took the hint and dropped the matter.
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